My dentist has an answering service. It's another one of those out dated, pre-tech things in the world that seemed to have just sat around waiting to be fixed. An eighty year old high school teacher of mine told me that before mimeographs and xerox machines they just spent mondays writing out their homework and fill-in-the-blanks work for the week. Would I have done better in school/flirted with cuter girls if on mondays we all took the time to look ahead and prepare?

The answering service somehow knows who I am calling, but can't do anything other than tell me their name. They can't give me an appointment, they can't have the doctor call me. They can only pass on my name and number and have the next idiot down the line call me back so we can start all over.

"Just, please, make a note for the doctor that my temporary filling has fallen out. My mouth tastes like dead people and I think I'm getting sepsis."

"We'll have someone call you."