When R Peach, an asshole conservative who emails the entire campus daily about how great war is,sent out his daily dispatch today, I replied asking when he was going to hold a pro-war rally on campus. And he said:
You mean me and my one man army? I have a pro-war rally every day in my room.
There aren't any conservatives on this campus.
That's the best masterbation euphemism I've ever heard.